- He makes sacrifices and never complains. Even when he is sick or in pain, he still goes above and beyond.
- He does things for others and never seeks approval or appreciation in return.
- He takes initiative and jumps in to do things without asking what needs to be done, or what he can help me with.
- His gifts are practical, thoughtful and useful. (This has frustrated me in the past...what's wrong with an occasional pretty thing that serves no purpose?) I've realized that he takes care to think about what is needed and provides those things for me, even for gifts.
- If there is an argument, he doesn't seek his own way, but becomes a peacemaker bringing the two sides to an agreement.
"Love suffereth long, and is kind; love envieth not; love vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not its own, is not provoked, taketh not account of evil; rejoiceth not in unrighteousness, but rejoiceth with the truth; beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things." (1 Corinthians 13:4-7) Nearly 18 years ago, these were our wedding vows. I have tried to put the words into practice in our marriage/family life, but the older I get, the more I realize I have failed often in the past. My husband has taught me many things through his example of showing love to me. Here are a few of the things I've learned over the years how he emulates a Biblical love:
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For this new year, my husband has decided to read the book, The Love Dare to us each day. He changes the word 'spouse' to 'loved one(s)'. So many of the principles can be easily applied to family love.
I thought I would share with you some of the things we have learned this past week. Our relationship with others has two main pillars: patience and kindness. Love is expressed in these two ways. Consider these questions: Do we use love and kindness in our speech to one another? Do we have patience in our actions and words? Are we motivated to do things out of kindness to one another (a desire to show love) or out of selfish need? I find myself often getting upset when my efforts were not being responded with appreciation. I was doing things from a selfish motive and not simply from a desire to show that I love my family. I challenge you to look at your own life. Are there ways that you can show more kindness and patience to your loved ones? "Beloved, if God so loved us, we ought also to love one another." (1 John 4:11) "For, brethren, ye have been called unto liberty; only use not liberty for an occasion to the flesh, but by love serve one another." (Galatians 5:13) Recently there have been several families with whom I have been able to spend some time. I have seen some common characteristics in these families. They have each left the church and have similar attitudes. These attitudes are becoming prevalent in our society and we need to counteract them in our homes. I haven't put an extensive amount of time into this yet, but I wanted to share with you these destructive attitudes that are coming into the home. Hopefully in future posts, I can deal with each of these specifically. Dangerous attitudes that are destructive to your families faith: 1. Scripture is open to any interpretation. This is one of the most scary to me. If we can't KNOW what God meant, then we will be floundering in a sea of unknowns. How insecure would that make one feel? “Knowing this first, that no prophecy of the scripture is of any private interpretation.” (2 Peter 1:20) We HAVE to be able to know what God meant or chaos and lack of faith ensues. 2. There is no absolute truth. This one is closely related to the first. “Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.” (John 14:6) Notice that Jesus said “THE truth”. This indicates there is one truth. 3. Everyone has their own path to God/Heaven. “Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me. If ye had known me, ye should have known my Father also: and from henceforth ye know him, and have seen him.” (John 14:6-7) 4. Jesus was just a good man who taught good things about how to live. You only have a few choices here. Either Jesus was LORD, the Son of God as he claimed to be and every word He says is true OR He was a LIAR OR He was a LUNATIC, or He was just a LEGEND. If you pick and choose what to believe out of what He said, then you are saying He was lying about some things. Either believe every word He says, or none at all. You can't have it half way. “I know thy works, that thou art neither cold nor hot: I would thou wert cold or hot. So then because thou art lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will spue thee out of my mouth.” (Revelation 3:15-16) 5. The Bible is just a book of myths like the Greek fairy tales or other books of myth. Honestly, this is one that I've had to take a pretty hard look at in the past. But, when you consider the fact that the Bible was written by about 40 men over about 1500 years and has no discrepancies, it is pretty amazing. No other book can claim such a thing. Also, if you read some of the other books of myth, they are similar to the Bible. In most cases, the Bible came first and is in my opinion the place where some of the myths were taken. 6. Evolution is a fact of science. This one is being taught in the schools and many children are taking it hook, line and sinker. When actually studied, these facts won't hold water. We MUST be diligent in teaching our children the truth about evolution. This is just the tip of the iceberg. The attitudes that I find sometimes astound me. It seems to me that people who are immersed in this type of thinking are searching, yearning for truth yet they tell themselves there is no truth. We must be active in keeping these attitudes from the home and countering these lies with the truth of God. I recommend books like Convicted, magazines like Think or Discovery Magazine for the younger ones. There are many others. Know the truth yourself and diligently teach your children as well.
In today's Bible reading, I read two verses together that I've never connected before. One is so often quoted separately that I often don't analyze it in its context. Here are the two verses: "Not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as the manner of some is; but exhorting one another: and so much the more, as ye see the day approaching. For if we sin wilfully after that we have received the knowledge of the truth, there remaineth no more sacrifice for sins," (Hebrews 10:25-26) I know this has been taught, that not attending worship times or Bible studies with our fellow Christians is a willful act of disobedience, but there it is. It is in black and white. Missing services for no reason is sin. Let's keep that in mind this weekend when so many peoples minds won't be on worshiping our Lord and Savior. Our attitude should be one willing to worship Him when and how He demands.
Lets all lighten up! With the new year coming, most people want to cut the fat from their diet. I suggest that we should 'cut the fat' from our houses too. We live in a society that is living high on the hog. There's so much stuff in our houses sometimes I wonder how we live and move! It certainly helps our attitudes to have less stuff. I'm sure we've heard it before, but let me share it with you again: “Then said Jesus unto his disciples, If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me. For whosoever will save his life shall lose it: and whosoever will lose his life for my sake shall find it. For what is a man profited, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul? or what shall a man give in exchange for his soul?” (Matthew 16:24-26) What are we teaching our children? Do we have 'stuff-itus' or are we teaching them that things are not important?
As we are nearing Christmas time and all of the celebrations that people are involved in with this time of year, it is always interesting to me to see the differences in how and what people celebrate. Since we are never commanded to celebrate Christ's birth (only his death) we should allow others their liberty in Christ to celebrate a day or not to celebrate as they see fit as long as they do not violate any of God's other commands in the process(Romans 14:4-6). One of the most ironic and hypocritical things that I have ever noticed will occur again this year all over this country since Christmas day is on Sunday this year. Many "Christian" people talk about how Christmas is a celebration of Jesus' birth and that is what they are supposedly celebrating on December 25th. So how will many of these individuals celebrate "Jesus' Birthday"? By giving Him gifts? By singing Him songs? By teaching others about Him? No the vast majority of people who believe they are celebrating Jesus' birth will do so by skipping church and not worshiping Him so that they can have more time for themselves and their family to feast and give each other presents. What a way to say happy birthday!
As I was getting ready to go to ladies Bible class this morning, I was thinking about things to encourage younger (or less experienced) teachers. I have been in positions to encourage others to teach and was running through some tips in my mind. I am not a very experienced teacher yet, but I have learned a few things the hard way. I've tried to make these general enough that you can use these tips for teaching your kiddos at home too! Please, use the comments to add your own tips! 1. Be prepared. I am ashamed to admit how many times I've shown up still with things to cut out or various other things undone. It really puts you in a better frame of mind if everything is laid out and ready. 2. Know your lesson. Again, too many times I've walked in and stumbled through a lesson. Did I make it? Yes. Did the students learn? Yes. But how much more could I have been able to teach them had I been better prepared and knew my information! 3. It is okay to say, "I don't know, let me get back with you." Even the best prepared teachers will have questions come up that they don't know the answers to. Be sure to write the question down and do follow through. At home with my kids I might say, let's go look that up right now. Tools such as e-sword and Strong's have been used around my house. (And for non-Bible topics, Google is such a valuable tool!) 4. Build up your students, don't tear down. I love the motto: The only stupid question is the one that is not asked. I tend to be very inquisitive, so I try to have patience with others that ask many questions. Try to respond to every question with variations of, "That's a good question." This helps to build confidence in the one asking. A good student will ask questions. These are just a few things. Please, add your own in the comments! Let's learn from each other!
“Commit thy way unto Jehovah; Trust also in him, and he will bring it to pass.” (Psalms 37:5) It seems to me that each child I give birth to, is a learning experience in trusting my God. With my firstborn child, I learned that I trusted too much in an earthly caretaker. She betrayed my trust in her and things went badly. My second pregnancy, I had to lean more on the Lord to trust that things would go better that time. They did. My third pregnancy was a surprise and I wasn't taking the proper nutrition to have a healthy baby...or so worldly wisdom told me. Again, I had to trust in God for a healthy baby.
So, here we find ourselves again with a surprise pregnancy, but this time I had been taking good vitamins. However, surprise, the ultrasound shows not one, but two babies. Do I need the Lord again? Oh, yes, more than ever! Does trust mean that God will answer every prayer in the manner in which we want? I'd have to say no because I see so many wonderful, Christian people who suffer with loss of loved ones. I know of a dear couple – he being an elder in the Lord's church – who raised 4 faithful children. The youngest happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time and took a bullet to the brain. He wasn't a soldier, just a college student caught in the middle of a shootout at a gas station. If we look at the example of Job, we see that the righteous will suffer. Job had a life full of blessings. Was God the source of the sufferings? No, God allowed it, yes, but the being behind the calamity in Job's life was Satan. Why does God allow Satan to do what he does? In the case of Job, God said to Satan, “Hast thou considered my servant Job, that there is none like him in the earth, a perfect and an upright man, one that feareth God, and escheweth evil?” (Job 1:8) God called him 'perfect'. What wonderful praise from God! May we all strive to have our Father give us this honor! To me, it seems as though God was teaching Satan a lesson. God said, here's my servant, and he's a great servant. But Satan said, “Aw, he's just righteous because you bless him so. If you took that away, he wouldn't be so righteous.” Satan didn't believe a word God said! So, God told Satan, “Go ahead, take away whatever you wish, but don't touch Job.” As the situation progressed, Satan eventually had to attack Job's health as well. Through it all, Job remained faithful to God. So what is the lesson we can learn? Nothing in this world is as important as our soul. “For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul? Or what shall a man give in exchange for his soul?” (Mark 8:36-37) We pray that our loved ones will be obedient and we do what we can to teach them, but ultimately we can only be responsible for our own soul. So, no matter what happens around me, it is just me and my God, forever and ever and I will remain faithful to Him. "In nothing be anxious; but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God." (Philippians 4:6)
It is funny, isn't it? How that before a baby is born, in those long 9 months, time seems to slow down. The anticipation of the coming event seems to stretch out the time, you seem to get everything done that is needed by the time of the long-awaited event occurs. Once the baby arrives, time flies by again and before you know it, the child is turning 10...or out of the home and married! So, my thoughts lately have been wondering this: If we anticipate the grand event of entering heaven, time should slow and we should focus on doing what needs to be done to get there. Our spiritual 'birth' into new bodies should be the thing we are longing for...the thing we desire most. So, let's get busy and work to get there! "For I reckon that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us. For the earnest expectation of the creature waiteth for the manifestation of the sons of God. For the creature was made subject to vanity, not willingly, but by reason of him who hath subjected the same in hope, Because the creature itself also shall be delivered from the bondage of corruption into the glorious liberty of the children of God. For we know that the whole creation groaneth and travaileth in pain together until now. And not only they, but ourselves also, which have the firstfruits of the Spirit, even we ourselves groan within ourselves, waiting for the adoption, to wit, the redemption of our body. For we are saved by hope: but hope that is seen is not hope: for what a man seeth, why doth he yet hope for? But if we hope for that we see not, then do we with patience wait for it." (Romans 8:18-25)
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